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Introduction: This morning we
will be continuing our study of Colossians 3:12-17 as we study the
Believer’s Profile. A profile is a set of characteristics that
identify you. One of the jokes we have in our family has to do with
home-schoolers vans. Whenever we see an oversized van that is in
pretty bad shape, we say, “There goes a home-school family.” We say
that because typically, homeschool families are large and need an
oversized van, and they live off a single income since the mother
works in the home at teaching the children, thus the family usually
can’t afford brand new vans. That is profiling. Drawing
conclusions about a person based on observable characteristics. And
believers should have a profile. We should have certain observable
characteristics in our lives that would compel the people in our
neighborhoods and communities and places of work to draw the
conclusion that we are not like the rest of the world. We are
different.
Review: Paul has
told us so far in this passage that we are to be marked by
compassion, kindness, humility,
gentleness, and as we saw last time we were together,
patience. This morning we are going to consider
bearing with one another". Read along with me from verse
12 through 14.
And so, as
those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart
of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; 13
bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a
complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so
also should you. 14 And beyond all these things put
on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.
What does it mean to “bear with”
one another? Who has an idea or example? “Bearing with” someone is
when you exercise self-restraint or tolerance with someone else. It
means to “put up” with someone else. How many of you ever get
irritated by other people’s idiosyncracies? When I was in High
School, I had a friend who would constantly blow little jets of air
out of his mouth and flip his hair up off his forehead. And it
bugged me tremendously. I had a teacher who would get his car keys
and dig around in his ears while teaching. And whether we want to
admit it or not, we all have these little quirks that irritate other
people.
Paul’s point in these verses is
that since we have been “chosen of God” and are “holy and beloved”
and have “put on a heart of compassion,” we should exercise
self-restraint and even tolerate one another. And I imagine most of
you agree with me so far because we all have these little odd things
we do, and since we want people to bear with us in our oddities, we
know we need to bear with others in their oddness. We need to treat
others the way we would like to be treated.
But what do you do when the issue
is not a personality quirk? In my last church, the deacon who mowed
the church lawn usually mowed it on Monday or Tuesday, and that
really bothered me! As I analyzed the situation, it made more sense
to me to mow on either Friday or Saturday so that the yard would
look nice and trim on Sunday when everyone showed up for church.
When you have company over for dinner, you don’t dust and vacuum and
clean the bathroom five days before they arrive, do you? No. You
clean as close to the arrival time as possible so that your house is
clean when they arrive. To me, that is the logical, sensible course
of action. But he would mow early in the week, and when we would go
to church on Sunday, most of the time the yard didn’t look neat and
trim. How do you deal with situations like these?
In this particular situation, it
obviously would have been appropriate to approach him and discuss
the matter and see if we could come to some kind of resolution. But
what if after the discussion the lawn continued to get mowed every
Monday? Paul says we are to “bear with” one another. We are to
exercise self-restraint. We need to remember that my way
of doing things isn’t always the only correct way to
do things. But what if my way is logical and the other person's way
is illogical? Does logic rule the day? No. Paul tells us that we
need to "bear with one another."
Now, what would motivate us to
live like this? Why would a sensible person ever choose toleration
over logic? Why would a person choose forebearance over personal
preference? The answer is in Eph. 4:1-3. Turn there
with me to see what Paul tells us the secret to being able to live
like this. "I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, entreat you
to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been
called, 2 with all humility and gentleness, with
patience, showing forbearance to one another in love, 3
being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of
peace." Love is what enables us to live and act in a way that
doesn't come naturally to us. None of us were born with spirit of
forebearance, but love for the other person enables us to rise above
our natural inclinations and do the right thing. I don't want to
spend too much time on this point becasue that is the focus of next
week's message that comes from Colossians 3:14, "Beyond all these
things, put on love which is the perfect bond of unity." But for
now just remember that loving people show forbearance to each other.
Transition: So when
it comes down to idiosyncrasies and personal preferences, I think we
can all agree that "bearing with one another" is the Christian and
right way to live. And living this way is radical enough to catch
the attention of the unsaved world and draw their attention to
Christ. But how should we handle bigger issues? Issues that you
believe involve actions that violate scripture?
I have three verses I want us to
look at, and then let's discuss what they mean for us today. The
first one is in Proverbs 10:12. "Hatred stirs up strife,
But love covers ("to clothe or conceal") all transgressions
(the word pesha
[v;P,
here has the idea of rebellion associated with it)." The next one
is Proverbs 19:11. "A man's discretion makes him slow to
anger, and it is his glory to overlook (to "pass over, through,
or by" cf. the conversation between the Pirate King and the Major
General in The Pirates of Penzance) a transgression
(the same word as in 10:12). The final one is in 1 Peter 4:8
"Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another,
because love covers (the word
kalu,ptw
kalupto originally meant "a hut" or "cabin" but came to mean "to
cover" or "veil") a multitude of sins (the-classic word for
sin in the Bible,
a`marti,a hamartia, "to miss the mark")."
What bearing does these three
verses have on the issue at hand? I want to be very cautions in
what I say here because this is a truth that can very easily be
abused (similar to our freedom becoming license and God's grace
leading to licentiousness). But I have come to the conclusion,
based on these verses, that as believers, there are times when we
have the option of overlooking another brother's sin. In other
words, there are times where we can choose not to confront the sin
and demand that the sinner repent and change his way.
Now before you throw me out on my
ear, let me give you some qualifications. 1) This is the
exception and not the rule for the believer. Generally
speaking, Mt. 17 and Gal. 6:1 carry the day for the Christian. When
we see a brother overtaken in a fault, we immediately go about
trying to restore him, even to the point of involving other
believers and even at times the entire church. 2) The magnitude
of the issue determines whether or not you invoke this option.
If your Christian friend comes to you and says he is very unhappy in
his marriage and is thinking about divorcing his wife, you don't
choose to "bear with" him. You deal strongly with him. And the
precedent for this it that in the OT, not all sins were punished
equally. If you stole something, you had to repay it plus some
extra, but if you worked on the Sabbath, you were put to death.
This is because all sins are not of the same magnitude. 3) The
state of the person's heart determines whether or not you invoke
this option. There is a difference between willful, defiant
disobedience and disobedience based on ignorance. In working with
my children, I can tell when I am dealing with sin based on a
rebellious spirit and when I am dealing with sin based on immaturity
or even emotional fatigue.
Conclusion: So
that's what Paul gives us as the sixth element of the Believer's
Profile, "bearing with one another." And aren't you glad that God
"bears with" you? |
